Saturday, December 19, 2015

The Inaugural Post: Our Netflix Horror Challenge


Joe and I welcome you to Rock, Paper, Hatchet.

This blog chronicles our bold experiment to wade together through random recent horror films on Netflix streaming.  Each month, our Netflix algorithm overlord will select four films.  We will post those titles, invite you to join us, and then settle in to have our senses assaulted in search of a pure, uncut, horror experience.  Reviews and discussion and consolation to follow.

I want to give a shout out to Stacie Ponder at finalgirl.blogspot.com.  Her "Shocktober" 2015 feature was something of an inspiration for this project.  I stumbled onto and then got addicted to Ponder's snarky, sharp takes on horror titles consigned to netflix obscurity.  Yet, at the end of Shocktober, she reported that she may not, in the end, watch ALL the netflix horror:  "There are just too many movies out there to watch, and for me to give one a go when it looks like garbage...I need some word of mouth or something, you know?

I was bummed.  Like an addict, I wanted more Ponder watching more crappy movies right now.  I was still feeling bummed about this when I ran into Joe, my old writing buddy from back in the halcyon days of videogame reviewing.  We both had embarked on real careers with real responsibilities since then, but we missed the fun of writing from the hip.  A couple beers later and the plan for Rock, Paper, Hatchet was born.  We'll give the garbage a go, Ponder, we'll be the mouths from which word can be had! 

With dubious purpose and misplaced conviction, we will take on the steady flood of Netflix bilge-water.  How long will we last?  That's part of the drama!  Why are we both reviewing the same movies?  Because, like being on a diet or going mattress shopping, torture is more bearable when its endured together.  Will we find that rare undiscovered hidden gem of true horror genius?  Unlikely, but hey, one never knows.

It's like going back to that magical moment after the rise of the video store but before the birth of online star ratings.  Remember wandering the aisles of VHS tapes, taking something home because it "looked" scary, and then just dealing with what you got?  That's this project, if the video store only carried the most unwatched, unloved and probably terrible horror movies.

Join us in our journey, or just watch as we slowly, but surely, succumb to the endless horror.


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